I Don’t Want to ‘Be’ Somebody

I just want to buy a coat

I understand that I might be tricky to shop for. In fact, I spend more time shopping for myself at Christmas than anyone else. My wife and my mom want “ideas” of things I would like. I don’t like most things. In fact, I am at least as good at not liking things as anyone else. It’s kind of a gift. Still, I know my mom wants to get me something that I’ll like and use but this year I was stumped.

This year, I needed a new coat. Who says 50-year-olds don’t grow out of their clothes? I felt pretty confident in the pick until my mother asked me what kind of coat, and could I send her some ideas. While it’s true that my mother hasn’t bought a coat for me in the last 30 years or more, it never occurred to me that she would want my opinion.

For the first 20 years she not only decided on my coat, but also my size. In the last three decades I’ve taken to getting my coats at Goodwill (I get most of my clothes there). My criteria maily has been, “Does it fit?” and “Is it stained?”

Patience is the key when you’re shopping Goodwill, and for a very long time, ways my wife and I would kill the occasional idle Saturday poking around there. It’s kind of like a clothes lottery: Will you find what you need when you need it?